May 10th and day 37 of my chemotherapy adventure and I'm a week away from the beginning of round 3! I have to say I'm really not looking forward to it either. I'm feeling better each day since the end of round 2 but it has been a struggle this time. The side effects this round have been the same as round 1 except the fatigue has been incredible. I don't think that I slept this much as a teenager! Each day I am feeling better and I can't say that my appetite has decreased at all. During the week of the treatment I have no appetite and eating is a real struggle but after the first week, if I am awake I'm eating. I can't remember a time ever in my life when I have been so hungry. I'm sure that I'm the first person who is gaining weight on chemotherapy. At this point my mind has been in less than stellar shape but I've just listened to my body and eat and sleep is all it seems to want.
It has been a while since I've updated my blog as it's been challenging to formulate a thought when I want to write. I can say that emotionally this is a real struggle. Life around me doesn't stop, in fact it seems to be rushing by and doesn't seem to include me right now. I don't say this because I'm down or feeling bad, it's just tough to be part of the routine of life when all I can do is eat and sleep. It has been great that some of my friends have been able to drag me out or stop by for a visit from time to time. I do wish that I could keep up with the amount of friends that want to touch base with me. It's overwhelming at times the amount of people in my present and from my past who send such support and who want to touch base with me. To all of you I will get back to you when I can.
Round 3 starts Monday May 16th and I can honestly say that I think I would rather cut off my own foot than do another round of this! However, I will do it and I will get through it. It still amazes me to think how chemotherapy works. The drugs they give me are, in combination, designed to kill any new cell development in my body. So for the last 37 days my body has been poisoned with the intent of killing any new growth including cancer cells. By the end of all of this my hope is that there is more of me left than the cancer! It really is a case of what doesn't kill me doesn't make me stronger, but may save my life.
For now I will say things are on course, I am doing well (all things considered) and that I really do appreciate all the love and support from all of you. I'm looking forward to getting to the end of this and joining you all back in living life. So for now I will say I'm also thinking of all of you and that I do cherish all the good thoughts. And as always Love you All!
Tuesday, 10 May 2011
Thursday, 28 April 2011
Beat up but not down
Day 3 of round 2 of my chemotherapy was a long day at the Tom Baker Cancer Centre. I arrived around 10 am and got my daily dose. It was really nice that my buddy Craig was able to stop by and visit for a bit in the afternoon. My day ended at around 5pm and my only goal at that point was to find my corner to go lay in and drool on myself some more.
Day 4 of round 2 was today and included a quick trip to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre to get my bleomycin IV bottle disconnected. I've developed a bit of an infection on my chest and had to meet with the doctor to check on it and see if the antibacterial medication is working. The chemo drugs pretty much destroy my immune system so something as little as a pimple can get out of control very easily. On the bright note the antibacterial medication does seem to be working and I have to go back on Monday for a follow up.
After my visit back to bed I went. I can't ever remember being so tired. My nausea is under control but I have to force myself to eat as I have no appetite. At this point all I want to do is sleep but even that can be hard as one of the medications tends to wind my brain up while my body just wants to lay there and drool on itself. This round seems harder with the fatigue and nausea but still I know it could be worse. I would like to say more, but right now, know that I'm doing good and my spirits are still up! My cheering squad is really helping and all the love and support that you all are showing means the world to me. So as always Love You All!
Day 4 of round 2 was today and included a quick trip to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre to get my bleomycin IV bottle disconnected. I've developed a bit of an infection on my chest and had to meet with the doctor to check on it and see if the antibacterial medication is working. The chemo drugs pretty much destroy my immune system so something as little as a pimple can get out of control very easily. On the bright note the antibacterial medication does seem to be working and I have to go back on Monday for a follow up.
After my visit back to bed I went. I can't ever remember being so tired. My nausea is under control but I have to force myself to eat as I have no appetite. At this point all I want to do is sleep but even that can be hard as one of the medications tends to wind my brain up while my body just wants to lay there and drool on itself. This round seems harder with the fatigue and nausea but still I know it could be worse. I would like to say more, but right now, know that I'm doing good and my spirits are still up! My cheering squad is really helping and all the love and support that you all are showing means the world to me. So as always Love You All!
Wednesday, 27 April 2011
Think I'm just going to sit here and drool on myself now
Day 2 of round 2 of my chemotherapy and things are going ok and sprits are still up. No really bad side effects today but the hiccups have returned with a vengeance but luckily I have the tranquilizers they gave me. They seem to be working so I'm going to sit here in the corner now and just drool on myself. As always love you all!
Monday, 25 April 2011
And Round Two Begins!
Day 22 and the first day of round 2 of my chemotherapy. I started off by heading down to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre for 9:15 am. A little early but just couldn't wait to get started I guess. It went well as the drug protocols are always the same: anti nausea medications, hydration, cisplastin, etoposide, anti nausea meds, and bleomycin for me to take home in my goodie bag.
Today was not bad and so far no major side effects although I feel pretty run down. I am still fairly pumped about the news of the tumour shrinkage and feeling very positive about getting through this round with more positive results. I had a conversation with a gentleman who has colon cancer that has spread to his lungs and he has been doing treatments every two weeks for the last two years now. His cancer is not curable but the treatments have been able to prolong his life. He told me his doctors never gave him this long and he said it laughing. It is remarkable the amount of people who face situations far worse than my own and can keep such a positive attitude. I also talked with another man who was in with his wife who has been undergoing treatment since 2000. 11 years and still fighting was really amazing to me. Hearing these stories really do put things into perspective and remind me that I am really lucky. My battle seems so simple in comparison and with far better results in the end.
I want to thank everyone for their words of encouragement, messages, texts, and e-mails. It really helps when I know I have such a large cheering section backing me every step of the way. As always love you all!
Today was not bad and so far no major side effects although I feel pretty run down. I am still fairly pumped about the news of the tumour shrinkage and feeling very positive about getting through this round with more positive results. I had a conversation with a gentleman who has colon cancer that has spread to his lungs and he has been doing treatments every two weeks for the last two years now. His cancer is not curable but the treatments have been able to prolong his life. He told me his doctors never gave him this long and he said it laughing. It is remarkable the amount of people who face situations far worse than my own and can keep such a positive attitude. I also talked with another man who was in with his wife who has been undergoing treatment since 2000. 11 years and still fighting was really amazing to me. Hearing these stories really do put things into perspective and remind me that I am really lucky. My battle seems so simple in comparison and with far better results in the end.
I want to thank everyone for their words of encouragement, messages, texts, and e-mails. It really helps when I know I have such a large cheering section backing me every step of the way. As always love you all!
Saturday, 23 April 2011
I'm Still Sane the Voices Tell Me So!
Day 18 of my chemotherapy adventure and things are going well. (Thursday April 19 - just a late post.) I feel great; I've been watching my diet, eating my greens and living life to the fullest. I still think that I'm getting off easy so far. For some this can be much worse but I also know that there are still 2 more rounds to go.
So today is meet with my doctor day and it all starts with a trip to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre for some blood work. The nurses, I think, are part vampire as they are very efficient in draining most of my blood and also really seem to enjoy doing so. After that my next stop was to see my doctor who tells me I'm good to go for round 2 and that things are responding well. In fact so well that some how I've even managed to gained 7 pounds. As I had mentioned in an earlier blog I had gone in to get a CT scan done to get a up to date picture of my tumours. The results were the best news I've heard in a long time. The chemo is doing its job and the tumours have shrunk by half. I also reviewed any problems and concerns that I've had with the last round and Yes! there is a medication that they can give me that will help with the hiccups. They did warn me that chlorpromazine can really knock me out as it is normally prescribed as tranquilizer for schizophrenics. Ok, so after a long discussion with the voices in my head we all agreed that it beats having the hiccups for 20 hours straight. So tranquilizers it is! For some reason Trysh and Noelle also thought that having me tranquilized was a great idea but neither the voices nor they would explain why. My final stop was the pharmacy to get my drug supply topped off and another shot of the Neulasta for day five of round 2.
I could have done the happy dance when they told me that the tumours were shrinking as it is a big relief to know that the chemo is working. Now I'm good to go for the start of round 2 on Monday but I would be lying though if I said that I am not having a bit of apprehension about this next round. Like sticking a finger down my throat to make my self vomit, there is something that just doesn't seem right about making my self sick even if the end result is that I'll be better. It's not that I'm worried, it's just that I really hate being sick. However, I have to say that I'm still very positive, my life right now is very simple and that I'm very happy! Thank you for all your support and as alway love you all.
So today is meet with my doctor day and it all starts with a trip to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre for some blood work. The nurses, I think, are part vampire as they are very efficient in draining most of my blood and also really seem to enjoy doing so. After that my next stop was to see my doctor who tells me I'm good to go for round 2 and that things are responding well. In fact so well that some how I've even managed to gained 7 pounds. As I had mentioned in an earlier blog I had gone in to get a CT scan done to get a up to date picture of my tumours. The results were the best news I've heard in a long time. The chemo is doing its job and the tumours have shrunk by half. I also reviewed any problems and concerns that I've had with the last round and Yes! there is a medication that they can give me that will help with the hiccups. They did warn me that chlorpromazine can really knock me out as it is normally prescribed as tranquilizer for schizophrenics. Ok, so after a long discussion with the voices in my head we all agreed that it beats having the hiccups for 20 hours straight. So tranquilizers it is! For some reason Trysh and Noelle also thought that having me tranquilized was a great idea but neither the voices nor they would explain why. My final stop was the pharmacy to get my drug supply topped off and another shot of the Neulasta for day five of round 2.
I could have done the happy dance when they told me that the tumours were shrinking as it is a big relief to know that the chemo is working. Now I'm good to go for the start of round 2 on Monday but I would be lying though if I said that I am not having a bit of apprehension about this next round. Like sticking a finger down my throat to make my self vomit, there is something that just doesn't seem right about making my self sick even if the end result is that I'll be better. It's not that I'm worried, it's just that I really hate being sick. However, I have to say that I'm still very positive, my life right now is very simple and that I'm very happy! Thank you for all your support and as alway love you all.
Tuesday, 19 April 2011
I've lost my hair but who would notice?
Day 15 of this chemotherapy adventure and finally something new to report. Over the last week I have been feeling pretty great over all. The worst thing to report would have been a bit of heartburn.
I have been keeping myself busy. Last weekend I moved my new roommate in. My youngest boy Gage is now living with me again and it sure is good to have him here. The apartment is getting small but it will do while I'm not working. When this is all over I do think we could use a little more space.
As for updates on my treatment there are a few developments. Last Friday I was down to the hospital to have another CT scan to get a more up to date picture, however, I won't hear about the results till I meet with my doctor on Thursday this week. Now on Thursday I will be meeting with my doctor but I will also be having some more blood work done at the same time. They want to make sure that I'm healthy enough to do round 2 which is scheduled to start on Monday.
The latest news is the loss of my hair. Yesterday I had what I had but this morning when I got up some of my hair decided to just stay in bed. For some people I think this can be something harder to deal with but I pretty sure I had already grieved the loss of my hair years ago. The hair just falls off, it doesn't pull out but if I touch it it falls off. I tried to shower thinking that it might just wash off but it didn't. Now I didn't really want to shed on everything for the next few days as it continues to slowly fall out so I found a new use for the lint roller. It was a stick tape lint roller and all I had to do was brush my hair with it and it all came off. So day 15 and the top of my head reflects a lot more light now. I suspect by the end of the week I'll be completely hairless.
I know a lot of you have been waiting to hear more from me and while nothing much has happened over the last week I will be staying on top of the updates when I start round 2 on Monday.
Thanks to you all for the notes of encouragement and as always love you all!
I have been keeping myself busy. Last weekend I moved my new roommate in. My youngest boy Gage is now living with me again and it sure is good to have him here. The apartment is getting small but it will do while I'm not working. When this is all over I do think we could use a little more space.
As for updates on my treatment there are a few developments. Last Friday I was down to the hospital to have another CT scan to get a more up to date picture, however, I won't hear about the results till I meet with my doctor on Thursday this week. Now on Thursday I will be meeting with my doctor but I will also be having some more blood work done at the same time. They want to make sure that I'm healthy enough to do round 2 which is scheduled to start on Monday.
I know a lot of you have been waiting to hear more from me and while nothing much has happened over the last week I will be staying on top of the updates when I start round 2 on Monday.
Thanks to you all for the notes of encouragement and as always love you all!
Monday, 11 April 2011
Day 8 (post chemo day 5) and things are going well.
In the fine tradition of being me, I do think I might have pushed myself a little this weekend but like I said before I'm still going to try and live my life. Saturday I felt really good and in fact was up really early. All those who indulged a little much the night before seemed to be doing much worse than me. My day consisted of getting together with my oldest boy who was heading off to Fort McMurray to make his fortune. I know he will do well, he is an amazing worker, especially when he puts his mind to it!
After that I had a new and amazing experience of my own; I went to my first opera: Aida. It was such an experience, something everyone should see. Thank you Noelle and the West family for letting me come along on this evening.
Sunday was a nice day and I took full advantage of the the weather by getting out for the day. Later that night I got together with some friends at this nice little Moroccan restaurant near Kensington. One thing that I did have to note is that my taste buds are starting to be affected and food is starting to lose it zest. Also, I learned that if it's spicy enough to reach my taste buds then I might want to avoid it for now. I very much did taste the food last night. In fact I tasted it all last night and most of today. The heartburn has been unbelievable and the anti-nausea meds are challenged to keep up with my active stomach. In all though was worth it! It was a good weekend with good people and I will always be so very thankful for all of you. So until I have something a little more interesting to say I will leave it at this: I'm doing well and as always Love you All!
In the fine tradition of being me, I do think I might have pushed myself a little this weekend but like I said before I'm still going to try and live my life. Saturday I felt really good and in fact was up really early. All those who indulged a little much the night before seemed to be doing much worse than me. My day consisted of getting together with my oldest boy who was heading off to Fort McMurray to make his fortune. I know he will do well, he is an amazing worker, especially when he puts his mind to it!
After that I had a new and amazing experience of my own; I went to my first opera: Aida. It was such an experience, something everyone should see. Thank you Noelle and the West family for letting me come along on this evening.
Sunday was a nice day and I took full advantage of the the weather by getting out for the day. Later that night I got together with some friends at this nice little Moroccan restaurant near Kensington. One thing that I did have to note is that my taste buds are starting to be affected and food is starting to lose it zest. Also, I learned that if it's spicy enough to reach my taste buds then I might want to avoid it for now. I very much did taste the food last night. In fact I tasted it all last night and most of today. The heartburn has been unbelievable and the anti-nausea meds are challenged to keep up with my active stomach. In all though was worth it! It was a good weekend with good people and I will always be so very thankful for all of you. So until I have something a little more interesting to say I will leave it at this: I'm doing well and as always Love you All!
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